Head Props Are People Too!
by wayunlucky13
Summary: This is a OneShot the movie outline told by the feather on Barbossa's head...It has opinions funny names and secrets you'd never think of...
1. Lady Feather Clementine

**Head Props Are People Too!**

**N/A:** Yep, this is really from my head... just one day... I was re-watching Pirates Of The Carribean when I saw Jack cut off one of the feathers on Barbossa's hat... and BAM! I had an idea...

**Disclaimer:** No, I don't own Pirates Of The Carribean or anything in it, I do however own Lady Feather Clementine's personalty and her sister's personality Queen of Barbossa's hear, Edwina Feather Flesh...

Yep, here she is in the flesh... Lady Feather Clementine...And yes that is my real name, Captain Barbossa was actually the one who named me... I remember that day all too well...About 10 years ago he was adjusting his hat on his head then he reached up and stroked me and my sister... "Well...Angels' I think it's about time I name you..."

he named my sister Queen of his head, Edwina Feather Flesh... what can I say Barbossa was a fancy guy...despite what many believed... he was also sensitive, and a sort of perfectionist. Had you ever had the chance to meet him, you would know that too, just by his posture, the way he speaks and gestures...you could tell he was a bit proud of himself too.

That same day, Jack Sparrow was marooned... Now you're thinking 'What does Jack Sparrow have to do with a story about Lady Feather Clementine?' Well I'll tell you that he has a lot to do with me... Honestly I watched him being betrayed, all the lying and discreetness of the one's who wanted Jack off the ship... I thought he was a pretty good captain... but me just being a feather all I could do is sit back, and watch... full of sorrow and guilt.

Barbossa noticed that I was down... because I wasn't standing proud and tall on his head like I usually did. He asked me why I was so sad... all I could do is shed some... he picked me off his head and stroked me... and comforted me... told me that it was okay...

After a few weeks I'd forget about Jack... then some crew member would bring him up in some joke or say, "If ol' Jack Sparrow saw this he'd roll in his grave..." and then I would hang once more with guilt...

I think Barbossa might've noticed that it was Jack that was upsetting me.. If he did... he never mentioned it... soon it became months without hearing about Jack, then finally years... I finally was feeling a little better... except the fact that the crew had become cursed by the treasure of Cortez.

Barbossa had grown weary and depressed, the crew became restless... and would go days with out a single word... other then when they found another person who had a piece of the treasure... But most days the ship went along in silence.

I must say that mistaking Elizabeth Swann was the worst luck we'd ever had... She didn't even look like a Turner...

I'm pretty sure if we hadn't mistaken Elizabeth for a Turner then maybe, just maybe Jack Sparrow would've never killed Barbossa... I might've pitied Sparrow, felt a little guilty... but now... pure hatred for the man who has no heart... he also killed my sister... Queen of Barbossa's head, Edwina Feather Flesh... had died that day...

HE killed her in a state of hatred so pure... you couldn't have cut it with a saw! Now he has made me about the same... killed my father (Barbossa) and my sister...I've become so full of rage and hate I stick straight up on the hat that has been my home...

It was Norrington who picked up the hat off of Barbossa'a head... he stole from the dead that day... I now sit in his office with the carcass of my deceased sister... watching the man every so often look towards me and smile happily... I'm now a trophy for a bounty hunter who had another do the dead for him...I'm a token of the death of many...

Any time a person comments on the hat on the bookshelf he has in his office... he has a look of pure pride and his gleam lies... when he retells the story of my father (Barbossa) final breathe... but no, he has to change it to make him look good... my hate for that man... made upon thousands of lies that I have just witnessed... burns hotter then any other hate I have known... someday I will get my sweet, sweet vengeance... Maybe I'll drive him to the land of the crazed and let him taste what being betrayed really is.

**Mel:** So how'd you like it? Review to tell me what did ya think... I thank you for at least reading this... it makes me feel special... thank you.


	2. The Explanation

**Chapter Two: The Explanation**

**A/N: **Now I wasn't planning on making a Second Chapter to this story...But after I saw Dead Man's Chest, I decided you must have some sort of explanation of how Barbossa got his hat back

**A/N:** For those who read my regular series.. 'On Winds Of Whiskey Breathe' I'm sorry I haven't updated for so long... but the Laptop broke and what I had on there was gold and I really don't wanna try and remember it all giving you a sad pathetic attempt at the greatness of the first version... And typing is _pure_ agony and torture. I truly hate copying anthing...

**Disclaimer:** No I don't own Pirates Of The Carribean or any of the characters in this story... I only own the explanation (however how faulty and wrong it may be.), I do however own Lady Feather Clementine's Personality and her sisters Personality 'Queen of his head, Edwina Feather Flesh'

**WARNING:** If you haven't seen **Dead Man's Chest** you may not want to continue further... as it contains spoilers... If you've seen it then carry on your merry may seemingly without a single care in the world... I hope you enjoy this...

**Lady Feather Clementine's POV:**

Yes. It's me, and you thought you'd go the rest of your days without hearing me ever again. It so happens, you've been proven wrong...horribly... and who said being right wasn't fun?

I've come back to update you on how my little life is going...I hope your life is going as good as mine.

I've had revenge... though not totally by my own hand... But. Those without hands can't be choosers in vengeance... AND seeing how I'm limbless I have no choice in the matter, unfortunately.

Norrington... he's gone.. His stench of rules and order... has disappeared.

What was his downfall?

I'll tell you gladly.

Now, you may not know this about me, but I'm slightly, however slightly psychic.. It's called a sixth sense... I can insert thoughts into people's heads... I've put some interesting thoughts into A LOT of people's heads...My best work though, was the thoughts I put into Lord Cutler Beckett.

See I might've told him just a little about the chest, Sparrow's Compass, and Norrington letting Sparrow escape! So of course, ME knowing his true intent... knew exactly what was about to unfold... Norrington was thrown out of his life and into a rundown, beaten, shell of a man. All thanks to **me**. Now because of the perfect timing I was able to also rid the world of '_Captain'_ Jack Sparrow, or that's what my source says.

I see now that you've been thrown into some sort of a rage by this, sweet, sweet Lady Feather Clementine couldn't hurt a fly... manipulated and plotted against people? Oh no, not possible at all is it? Well **it** is. Surprising? Maybe. A little feather grieving and limbless, being an indirect cause of a death? Not probable, eh? Well it happened.

Now, one problem arose with my plan... that is, Norrington did something so unpredictable, so unlike the characteristics of him, so surprising, and truly against the laws of nature. He was, unpredictable. He lied, he cheated, he stole, all in a pathetic attempt to rise once again to the top!

I'm not quite sure of the outcome of that one... like I said, "I'm slightly, however slightly psychic." I'm pretty sure I've discovered a few holes in my plan...

Like the possibility that Jack survived the Kraken, or maybe how Norrington was unpredictable... but I guess that's to be expected... seeing how once you tear a man's insides out and make him stitch himself back up again... unpredtictability is to say in the least...expected.

That was rather inane of me.

But what was a feather to do? I couldn't very well have stopped him, could I? I can't change feelings on matters in the minds of others... I don't know why, honestly I'm cursing some nameless deity for it... Call it fate or destiny or 'them'... I don't care.

So what? A little setback perhaps? I'll get him later... for now I'm rejoicing.

What for? You ask, the answer is simple... **He**'s back. He might've never told me how he got here or how he came back from the dead, or if he even went to heaven or heck. He revealed none of the inescapable ending of everything or even why he didn't come sooner.

How do I know he came back?

He rescued me.

How? You ask.

I'm not entirely sure of that.

One thing is for sure though..I'm happy.

I don't care anymore if Sparrow survived the Kraken or if Norrington will rise once again. My father, is back.


End file.
